Tragic Little Turkey Day

Last year's Thanksgiving was one of those holidays that entire movies are made to mock.  Clark and Ellen Griswold would have fit right in!  The details still stress me out a year later, so I'm going to completely skip over that memory....saving it for a blockbuster screenplay!  CALAMITY!



If the holiday plans being leveled by cosmic forces wasn't bad enough......I found myself on the Wednesday night before Thanksgiving with no turkey, no fixings, nothing, and three people to feed.  This was a huge problem, mainly because I always make such a big deal about table settings, and was completely ill-prepared. Table for three?  I hate table for three, no symmetry!  But alas, we needed turkey!  Only one thing to do, hit the the twenty-four hour supermarket.

As a general rule, I detest marketing, food shopping, grocery stores, hate it!  But, there's nothing worse than the scramble that occurs the night before major eating holidays, what a nightmare. I lucked out though, there were several pre-cooked turkey dinners that had been abandoned in the deli.  JACKPOT!
The only thing missing was a great fall centerpiece, which proved more difficult to locate than the bird.  I was forced to grab the last sad little bouquet of fall flowers; droopy, wilted, some deceased.

I always like to set the holiday table the day before if possible.  I'm not really sure why, but some of my relatives always did it, so I just acquired the habit.  Is that weird?  I cut the stems off the remaining living flowers, dunked them in a square Ikea vase, and done.  It didn't look bad, but I wouldn't say it was good either.  I phoned it in.  Is that bad?

There would only be three of us, so I just used the kitchen table........I had given up before I had begun. Why mess up a perfectly spotless dining room?  Limit the mess is always my motto.  The linens hadn't been to the dry cleaner, I ironed for over and hour, they still looked wrinkled.  No big deal, I would be the only female, nobody would notice.  (I noticed though, it drove me nuts that day, and it drives me insane looking at the photos).  I disguised it as best I could with some leftover craft leaves,  some 'Gobble' dessert plates from Pottery Barn, and done.

I dumped the contents of my 'box o' turkey' into everyday serving dishes, heated the bird for an hour and done.  I wish I could say I have the entire thing planned out this year, but sadly, that would be a lie.  The only thing in the pantry are Ramen Noodles, the whole wheat pasta nobody would eat, and half a jug of Beverly International Protein Powder.  We are just one of those last minute families, keeps it interesting.  Honestly, I don't really love Thanksgiving, it puts too much stress on me before the 'real' holiday, BLACK FRIDAY!!!!