I'm very mesmerized by the A&E television show, Hoarders. I think the new season starts this week, I'm pretty excited about tuning in. I don't know if there will be an episode that can possibly trump the one with the lady that had thousands and thousands of dolls and teddy bears, but it's worth watching to find out! I know, that's a pretty tragic admission, but it's the truth, I love that show. I suspect I could become a serious hoarder without much difficulty. But, I would be an organized hoarder, meticulously labeling all of the hoarded items with my P-Touch. Wait! I already do that, uh oh. Is it still considered hoarding if all of the junk is neat and labeled?
In the spirit of self-help, I'm going to try and purge some of the items I don't need. The experts say if you haven't used it in three years, get rid of it. I can't begin to express how hard this is for me. I am attached to my stuff, my memories, I need them. Recently, my dad forced my hand on one particular item that I probably would have stacked in a 'keep' pile. I received a phone call from pops informing me that he was throwing away my book report diorama from grade school. GASP! There was no negotiating, and with hundreds of miles separating me from my childhood treasure, I had no choice but to let it go. What if I need my book report from thirty years ago, what if? Dad didn't care, he was sick of a faded piece of cardboard taking up space in his garage for the last three decades. Can you blame him?
Dad begrudgingly agreed to take a picture of my little keepsake. Is it weird I demanded he photograph it before sentencing my art to the dump? All of these years later, I still think my 'award winning' report on The Long Winter, by Laura Ingalls Wilder, was pretty sweet. I highly doubt I read any of those books, I hated reading. I loved the television show though, I still watch it on the Hallmark Channel all of the time. If you think about it, this is possibly my first primitive example of Knock Off Decor, not sure if Beckie will count it as a true knock off or not! If you are/were a fan of 'Little House' as we die-hard fans call it, then it's obvious I just copied the NBC version of the cabin. I give myself a solid 10 for the knock off! It's awesome when one can win a hand-made ribbon for a book that was never read, before the days of Internet plagiarism. I can't believe my dad felt the need to trash something so wonderful that won an award for 'mood' and everything! Clearly, he doesn't understand my talent. 'Honorable Mention' goes out to my mom, I'm sure she did the angel hair as snow, she never would have let me touch that stuff. Every Christmas she would rant and rave, "Angel hair can cut worse than a knife, people have died from handling angel hair." I made up the part about people dying, but it was funnier that way. She probably just didn't want us fooling around with her Christmas vignettes, but her warnings worked, I'm still terrified of the stuff ripping my meat hooks to pieces. Ah, the memories.
One sofa or two? Help me decide!
1 day ago